Had to Share

Time to Rock the Boat

An environment where few strive to be amazing, but are swallowed by everyone else who is happy with the status quo. No one asks the important questions. No trust. No honesty. Goals are set, but then undercut. Statistics are massaged. People are fake, false and afraid of change.  Dealing with the customers becomes an exercise of anger or frustration or an exhausting experience answering the same questions. People are afraid to make decisions; are afraid to step up to the ledge; are afraid to be wrong. No one is happy; no one takes pleasure in the work; no one takes chances. Motivation wains. Stagnant. Fear. Disappointment.

Is this any way to work? Is this any way to go through life? Is this any way to make a difference? There is a better way to do things, to go through life, to make a difference. Someone has to ask the important questions, rock the boat, get people out of their comfort zones. We all have the ability. We just need to find the confidence and stop caring what the status quo thinks. Keeping your head down is no way to go through life and it is certainly no way to make the world a better place. You might not be the most liked-hell, it could get you fired-but at least you tried. Make waves, the bigger the better.

Igniting the Passion

A little over seven years ago, I dropped out of law school (after a little over a semester) and moved to follow my ex as she took what was the job of her dreams. Ever since then, I have been searching for a job (or career) that would set my soul on fire. I decided I wanted to work to improve the lives of animals and have since worked in large, medium and small organizations for animals on an international, national and local level. In those seven years, I have moved around the Midwest and East, the marriage ended (which I now know was a really good thing), have added some more animals to my family, have lost a couple of these animals, have grown a lot, have battled some personal demons and have found an amazingly loving and interesting woman who, for some reason, is happy sharing her life with me.

I am not the same person who made the decision to leave law school. I have learned a lot since that time about who I am, what I stand for and developed a lot of the values I hold dear. I have also become a bit more jaded and cynical, having seen things I would never wish upon anyone...having seen the way our society and individuals can treat animals with disdain, lack of care or abuse. I have helped animals in these situations escape them and I have helped some people see there are other ways and have shown them how to integrate these animals into their family; how to care for them in ways to make both of their lives better. I've embraced new ideas as they have come along and believe I have evolved with the times.

I haven't found the job or career for which I have casted about. I have also realized this is probably more because of who I am rather than the jobs I have worked. I constantly look for something new and different, thinking this magical "it" will make me happy. I want to do more and more, but I am fearful of actually doing it. This fear is two-sided...one one side, I am afraid of failing at something I want to do. On the other side, I am afraid of not failing but finding that something I can do is not what I want to do. I want to be more big picture, but I focus more on the day to day and menial tasks instead of thinking big picture. I want to be a leader, but choose instead to sit back and be a doer. I want the freedom to develop my own plans and prioritize my programs and duties, but then have to force the motivation to get the things done when there isn't a lot of busy work to do.

I want to let go of this fear and step forward and say I can help lead; I am valuable as more than a worker; I have big thoughts and ideas. I am working on doing this more every day, but I need to figure out how to eliminate the fear making this difficult. I need to figure out what it is about me that makes this so damn challenging. I look at all the people I have worked for and with over the last seven years and see great leaders, average leaders and terrible leaders. I have had the privilege of working for people who are amazing people, but terrible leaders and amazing people who are also great leaders. I have learned different things from each. I have managed large groups of people and pushed them to excel. I have had people push me to excel. But, when it comes down to self-motivation, I sometimes have a problem with pushing myself to excel. Maybe I want too much? Maybe the perfectionism that has been around since I was five is weighing too heavily? Maybe I am supposed to be a great doer and not a leader? Maybe I just haven't found or developed the position that will allow me to be everything I think I can? Maybe I should be doing something else entirely?

I do know I will never stop looking. I do know I have to overcome this fear at some point and step out to the edge and decide to leap. I have overcome some fear in my personal life and taken some really hard looks in the mirror and changed some things about me that needed to be changed. I have overcome some of the things that have held me back and not allowed me to develop as a person. I have learned when I put my mind to something, really put my mind to it, then I can follow through and make the changes needed. I just have to keep working at it. With some work, maybe I will become the leader I think I can be. Or, maybe I will realize the passion lies elsewhere, doing different things. Maybe I don't have to change the world, but only my part of it. Maybe with a bit of work, I will realize the passion is here, I just needed to find it. Maybe within our lives, it is more about the journey and not the destination. Maybe the real goal is to never stop looking.

Living with an Artist

Living with an artist can be very interesting. As of last Friday, we (meaning Leila really wanted to and I love her enough to say okay) cancelled Direct TV. So, now we do not have television. For those of you who know me, that is a pretty big deal. I honestly can not remember the last time I was without cable of some sort or another. Although I don't like to admit it, I enjoy watching television and entering that stupid zombiesque trance-like state.


Who knows what this will actually mean for me. Hopefully, I will read more and write more and build more and do all of the things that I kept putting off when I came home from work and collapsed on the couch to watch (usually after cooking dinner) an obscenely giant screen. Hell, you might just have to put up with me writing more blog entries (if anyone actually reads this). Since the TV has been off, I have already finished my taxes and read more. Plus, this last week's weather has got me really thinking about Spring and the garden, so maybe I will really start planning out my next few moves. I have decided to grow from seed and need to get going on this. I really have no idea how this is going to change the way I live, but at least I am in some good company, eh?


What is being lost is the magic of the word.  I am not an image person.  Imagery belongs to another civilization:  the caveman.  Caveman couldn't express himself so he put images on walls.  ~Elie Wiesel, 1995


The television, that insidious beast, that Medusa which freezes a billion people to stone every night, staring fixedly, that Siren which called and sang and promised so much and gave, after all, so little.  ~Ray Bradbury, The Golden Apples of the Sun


Television has done much for psychiatry by spreading information about it, as well as contributing to the need for it.  ~Alfred Hitchcock


Television was not intended to make human beings vacuous, but it is an emanation of their vacuity.  ~Malcolm Muggeridge


Art is moral passion married to entertainment.  Moral passion without entertainment is propaganda, and entertainment without moral passion is television.  ~Rita Mae Brown

An Agglomeration of Vegan Vittles

Raspberry Apple Pie (before the top crust) 

 Whole Wheat Bread (by the lovely Leila)

 Jamaican Red Bean Stew

 Ginger Snaps (also by the Lovely Leila)

 Chocolate Soy Ice Cream

(I LOVE MY ICE CREAM MAKER)

Indian Veggie Stew

"Good painting is like good cooking; it can be tasted, but not explained." 

Maurice de Vlaminck

Veggie Pot Pies

2011 is going to be a year of new recipes. I have become a little complacent with the old standbys. While they are good, I want to increase my repertoire and try some new things. This is the beginning of what could be a really tasty year!

“Cooking is like love. It should be entered into with abandon or not at all.” 
                                -Harriet Van Horne

2011

Here's hoping 2011 brings us all what we want and need. The new job is still fresh and I am loving every minute (even if some of them are frustrating). I know it is only going to get better and I will be able to really help some of the animals in our community who need it the most. We have to work really hard this year if we truly want KC to become a No-Kill community by 2012.

I still hear Thailand calling to me. Leila and I need to figure out how to make this trip a reality. If not Thailand, then we need to start getting out of the country and exploring the world once a year, at least. There is so much to learn by doing. You can read all the books about travel and watch all the shows, but until you can smell and taste the country, you really don't know what it is like.

Speaking of Leila, I am a very lucky man. She makes me smile and laugh and feel loved. She is smart and funny and talented and imaginative and beautiful. 2011 is only going to bring great things for us.

I don't really make resolutions anymore, but I have thoughts and plans and hopes and dreams, some I share, but most I keep to myself. There are things I want and things I need and we will see what this year brings. Here's hoping everyone has a wonderful year and 2011 brings your dreams even closer!  

Words of Wisdom from Uncle Walt

“This is what you shall do: love the earth and sun, and animals, despise riches, give alms to every one that asks, stand up for the stupid and crazy, devote your income and labor to others, hate tyrants, argue not concerning God, have patience and indulgence towards the people, take off your hat to nothing known or unknown, or to any man or number of men; go freely with the powerful uneducated persons, and with the young, and mothers, of families: read these leaves in the open air every season of every year of your life: re-examine all you have been told at school or church, or in any books, and dismiss whatever insults your soul.”
-Walt Whitman

Notre Dame Goes Bowling

Ahh, things were starting to look as if Leila and I would be going to see Notre Dame in Orlando for the Champs Sports Bowl. As games were played yesterday and with wins by Washington, UConn and West Virginia, coupled with Oregon State losing (as if anyone thought they would beat Oregon), it looks as if Notre Dame will probably be going to El Paso on New Year's Eve to play in the Sun Bowl against Miami. I will be sitting on my couch watching this game, if this is indeed where the Irish end up. In a few hours, we should know exactly where the Irish will go bowling...

World Cup Announcement Day

Today, FIFA will announce the locations of the 2018 and 2022 World Cups. Let's go USA! 

Humane Education and Resource Office (HERO) Program Manager

Yep, that's soon to be my new title and I am bloody excited about it. No More Homeless Pets Kansas City has offered me the above position and I start December 13th. More to come as the date approaches...did I mention that I am really, really bloody excited!?!

Proposition B

In November, Missouri residents have the opportunity to vote on Proposition B, also known as The Puppy Mill Cruelty Prevention Act. If you would like to read the proposed statute in its entirety, you can view it here: http://www.sos.mo.gov/elections/2010petitions/2010-086.asp. In essence, this act will require large scale breeding operations (more than 10 dogs) to provide each dog the following:

1. Sufficient food and clean water
2. Necessary veterinary care (at least one visit per year)
3. Sufficient housing, including protection from the elements
4. Sufficient space to turn and stretch freely, lie down and fully extend his or her limbs
5. Regular Exercise
6. Adequate rest between breeding cycles

This act would also limit the number of breeding dogs to no more than 50. Sounds reasonable, eh?

Having worked for the last five years in an animal shelter in Kansas City, I have seen the results of the over  3,000 puppy mills, both licensed and unlicensed, found in Missouri. I have held the dogs who are missing limbs, who have teeth rotting out of their mouths, who are so matted you don't know their sex until after they have been groomed, who are infested with fleas and ticks and intestinal parasites, who have brucellosis and mastitis, who are terrified to walk on the grass because they never have before and who need calm, caring homes because they have never known human interaction and love.

I have also held the dogs we couldn't save. The dogs I, and many others, had to euthanize. The dogs who were so far gone that no amount of medical or behavioral help could undue the years of damage inflicted upon them by the people who only viewed them as a way to make money.  These dogs all started out like the dogs lying at you feet or sleeping in your bed or giving you years of endless joy and unconditional love. We have the right, the opportunity and the duty to stand up and say no more.

In November, we have the responsibility to pass Proposition B. It is time for all of us to stand together to let the operators of puppy mills know they are no longer welcome in Missouri, that Missouri no longer wants to be known as the puppy mill capital of the world and that we will no longer stand for this abuse.

Please visit http://www.yesonpropb.com/ to find out what you can do to help!

Kitchen Project Part II

It's been a while since I have updated anything and wanted to let you, my dear reader, see what I have done with the kitchen. There is still a little work left to be done (the floor and a couple more shelves), but things are coming together beautifully. I love the new kitchen.

Kitchen Project---Part I

Before:

Day one

Day three

Garden July 2010

Life just wouldn't be as nice without a garden.