Enjoy The Ride

You don't have to listen to the advice people give you. Hell, most of the time you probably shouldn't. When someone starts telling you the best way to chase you dreams or why you should do this over that or how to live a life of happiness, be wary. This may seem a bit ironic coming from someone who has built a blog on giving advice, but it's the truth. The life you are living is your life...do with it what you will.

You see, what works for me may not work for you. There's a good possibility what works for you won't work for me. You can listen to the what people say, but you don't have to embrace it. You can learn from the people around you, but you still have to figure out what works for you. No one has everything figured out, no matter what they tell you.

We all struggle through life, never knowing if we are making the right decision. They key to it all (and yes, I realize this is advice) is to never stop trying. Succeed or fail, as long as you are doing something, you are on the right track. No matter what happens, just never stop trying. Struggle, fight, fail, succeed, move forward, stumble back, fall down, get up...just do.

No matter what, enjoy the ride. If you don't enjoy (at least at some level) the life you lead, what's the point?

Never Stop Trying

The great thing is we get another chance each and every day. We may not get everything right every time we try, but we don't fail until we no longer try. Too many times, many think if they don't get it right the first time, then they have failed. This just isn't the case...no one is perfect. We won't get it right the first time, every time. When things don't work, we just have to get up and try again.

It's up to you. You are the only person who controls what you do. Will you keep pushing forward? Will you keep chasing you dreams? Will you blaze your own path? Will you do whatever it takes? Will you believe in yourself? Will you keep trying? You never fail until you stop trying. Never stop trying.

Stop Complaining

Every day, I hear people complaining about the things that are without doing anything to change them. I do a lot of this complaining myself. The thing is, complaining doesn't change anything. Complaining doesn't get people to do things better. Complaining doesn't show people a better way to do something. Complaining doesn't put you in a positive mood and complaining certainly doesn't help you get things done. Complaining does demotivate you and demotivates everyone around you.

If you don't like something, then change it. Don't complain about it, change it. This is a simple concept, but one most people will never grasp. We feel better when we complain and people listen. It takes work to actually make changes, but complaining is easy. We might have to have difficult conversations to make changes, but complaining allows us to have easy bitch sessions. We may have to hold ourselves to a higher standard to make changes, but complaining allows us to feel like we did something when we really didn't. We may have to eliminate something we like to make changes, but with complaining, we can convince ourselves that we don't really need to anything.

Stop complaining. If you don't like something, then work on changing it. Putting in the work and making change isn't going to be as easy as complaining, but it's going to make you feel a lot better. It will also help you improve. Quit whining and start working towards making things the way you think they should be. If we all stop complaining and start calling each other on it when we do, we will all have an amazing shot at success.

Start today. If you feel the need to complain or you catch yourself complaining about anything, stop, think about what you can do to make things change AND do whatever it takes to make the change. Have the difficult conversation, exercise more, study longer, watch less television, do some extra work, eat a little less, write more, say no, quit your job, take that chance, ask for help, ask the person out...do whatever it takes to make the change you need to make. Try it for one month. At the end of October, look back on you month and see if things improved. See if you feel better about yourself and the life you live. See if the lack of complaining changes your outlook and your motivation. Try it for one month...if it doesn't do anything, you can always go back to bitching and moaning about everything.

Personally, I would rather get shit done.

What Is My Purpose?

For the majority of us, knowing what we are supposed to do with our lives would be wonderful. This would be the one question most people would what answered. What is my purpose? Most of us just don't know what it is we are supposed to be doing (or even if there is something we are supposed to be doing). We hear people talk all the time about following our passions and doing what makes us happy, but many of us don't really know what our passions are, or if we do, how to make a living doing them. We get stuck in this struggle of wanting to love what we are doing but constantly thinking there must be something more out there to make us happier and feel more fulfilled.

Yes, there may be something better out there waiting for you. There may be something that sets your soul on fire. There may be something that makes you want to jump out of bed each morning and attack the day. There may be something better, or there may not. We don't know. That's the scary part. Do we constantly chase this unknown? Do we continue to give up what we have, thinking there may be something better, without really knowing? It's the Let's Make A Deal decision with life. "You have $5,000 but do you want to risk it for what is behind door number 2?" You have a job and a life that does bring happiness (more if you would let it), but do you want to risk it for what is hidden out there?

After reading that, you may think you have an answer, but what if I asked the questions in a different tone? Do you want to settle with what you have, thinking you are not as happy as you could be? Can you continue to do what you do, all while believing there is something more out there? Can you give up searching with the knowledge that you aren't as passionate as you want? Do you risk the hum drum existence you have for the chance of finding the greatness hidden out there?

You see, there are always two ways to look at things. I believe we need to find the happiness in what we have and what we do, while constantly searching for more. Searching doesn't always mean you have to quit your job and go looking for something different. In some cases it will mean this, but in others it won't. Your choices have to be your choices and your path will be different than every other path. You have to do things in your own way. You can't make all the choices someone else made because what works for them may not work for you. You have to solve these dilemmas based on your life, not based on someone else's life. How you decide to answer the questions above is personal. How you decide to proceed is up to you.

There is never going to be any "one size fits all" answer to finding our passion and happiness. Some people will find this search to be incredible easy, but others will struggle their entire lives. This doesn't make anyone right or wrong, it is just their path. The way you go about achieving everything you want probably won't work for many other people. We are all going to look at the issue differently, so there can't be a perfect solution. You can read as many books and blogs as you want. You can listen to all the experts, but in the end you are going to realize two things:

1) Different people will have different ways to "achieve" finding passion and happiness and many of these ways will contradict each other.
2) The vast majority of us are in the same place. Even the people who seem to have it all figured out will often have doubts about their purpose.

The answers to the big questions will never be one size fits all. These answers won't be found in books and they won't be found on blogs. No one can tell you what is going to work for you. You have to find it for yourself. You have to decide what is going to work for you. You have to get our there and explore and dream and work and hurt and love and fail and succeed and live. Asking the question is fine. Wondering if there is more out there is normal. You aren't in this by yourself, but you have to find your own answers. The real question is: Are you going to look for them?