Be Calm In Your Heart

We are constantly surrounded by noise, trouble and hard work, but for many of us, we are rarely at peace. We have a hard time being calm in our heart. We are constantly rushing around, contributing to the noise and chaos. It can become frustrating being enveloped by this chaos, but this frustration only leads further and further away from the peace we desire. Being outwardly calm doesn't always equal being calm in your heart, but it can start you along the path towards peace.

One thing we all need to do is become better at accepting things as they are, especially when we can not change them. This acceptance helps to alleviate the frustrations and dampens the din around us. Part of being calm is knowing there are things of which you have no control and accepting this. We can't change everything about the world around us, but when we realize this, the world around us will change for us. As illogical as this sounds, the way we view the world makes the world what it is for us.

Let go of the frustrations over the things you can't control. Take control over the things you can. When you are able to orchestrate the things you can and feel no frustration towards the things you can't, calmness will begin to find it's way into your heart. As with every great thing we do, this won't be easy and will take time and practice. The more you practice, the easier it will become. 

Try Something Else

We take everything way too seriously. As a whole, we spend too much time stressed out about things that really don't matter. We look for meaning in every little piece of data we can find, failing to see that some things just happen. We try to control the world around us without realizing the only thing we have any control over is ourself (and sometimes even that is doubtful). By only reacting to the things happening around us, we never really live.

For most of us, we just need to let go and let whatever happens, happen. The "bad" things that could happen are usually not as bad as we think they will be and the "good" things we hope for are usually not as good as we imagine. Realizing we have little control of the world around us, we can instead focus on ourselves and how we interact with this world. We can work on how we react to the stimuli around us. We can really decide who we want to be, instead of trying to be the person we think everyone wants us to be.

This isn't easy. I don't even know if I am a good person to even talk about it as I haven't come close to perfecting it in my own life, but it needs to be said. We create a crazy world by spending so much time worried about what other people are doing or thinking. We create a world where bullying is the norm because we criticize differences instead of celebrating them. We create a world full of violence and hate because we are more worried about who are neighbor prays to than we are about how we act. We create a world full of difficulty because we take our thoughts and ideas so seriously we can't believe anyone would think something different.

We are all different people with different thoughts and experiences. This has led us to different beliefs and thoughts about what is important. These differences should be celebrated instead of feared. Instead of distrusting your neighbor because they are different, spend time getting to know and laughing with them. Instead of thinking everyone else is wrong, realize more than one person can be right. What is right for you may not be right for others. We are born, live our life and then die. Every one of us has this in common. We can't control everything that happens during the course of our life, but we can control how we look at each day and how we react to the things that do happen. Smile more. Laugh more. Stop taking things so seriously. Trust each other and help build a better, safer and more peaceful world.

It won't be easy and it may not make this world any better, but what we are doing now sure isn't working. Maybe it is time to try something else?

Let It Go

Walking around with built-up bitterness is a recipe for disaster. When we feel slighted or screwed over by someone we will often hold resentment towards this person for years to come. We will constantly talk about how we really dislike them and will let others know how we were screwed over.

Everything the person does is viewed through a lens of negativity. We assume every decision is one based on malice and bad intent. We may even think that anything done now is still an attempt to one up us or make us look bad. Some of us will struggle the rest of our life trying to prove the other person wrong. 

The sad part is we can never, ever do our best work when we are doing it out of spite or in an attempt to show someone they were wrong about us. We can only do our best from a place of peace. Our motivation to do great work should not come from a place of negativity, like proving someone wrong. We will all do this from time to time, but when the past wrong constantly drives us, we will go nowhere good.

As hard as it sounds and as hard as it is to do, we have to let go of these negative emotions. They are doing nothing good for us and will only continue to bring us down. Yes, the person may have screwed us over. Yes, they might still be doing things in an effort to discredit us. Let them worry about the negativity they are bringing to their work. If this is really their goal, nothing good will come of their emotions, either. We have to be the bigger person and just let go. We should do the work we want to do and not worry what anyone else thinks, especially people we don’t like.

Bitterness can only be a driving force for so long. It feels like it is pushing us forward and helping accomplish things, but in the end, it will only lead to burnout and disappointment. Eliminate the bitterness and we will be able to find motivation from positive sources.

Think about why you do the work you do. There may be some bitter motivator, but for many of us, we do the work because we want to make a difference. We do things we are good at. We do things we love. We have a vested interest in what we do. In any case, the motivation behind your best work is always going to be positive motivation. Forget the past and move towards the future while living in the moment. Getting over the past isn’t going to happen overnight and is going to take time, but as we continue to work towards it, we will feel better.

There is nothing we can do to change what has happened and very little we can do to change people’s minds or attitudes. But, we can leave the game they are playing and play our own. No one says we have to get along with everyone. We have to live our life the way we see fit and there will be some people who just don’t figure in to it. Instead of letting them ruin your day, your week or longer, just move on with your life. Eliminate the bitterness and let the positive motivation allow us to do the best work we have inside.