Try Something Else

We take everything way too seriously. As a whole, we spend too much time stressed out about things that really don't matter. We look for meaning in every little piece of data we can find, failing to see that some things just happen. We try to control the world around us without realizing the only thing we have any control over is ourself (and sometimes even that is doubtful). By only reacting to the things happening around us, we never really live.

For most of us, we just need to let go and let whatever happens, happen. The "bad" things that could happen are usually not as bad as we think they will be and the "good" things we hope for are usually not as good as we imagine. Realizing we have little control of the world around us, we can instead focus on ourselves and how we interact with this world. We can work on how we react to the stimuli around us. We can really decide who we want to be, instead of trying to be the person we think everyone wants us to be.

This isn't easy. I don't even know if I am a good person to even talk about it as I haven't come close to perfecting it in my own life, but it needs to be said. We create a crazy world by spending so much time worried about what other people are doing or thinking. We create a world where bullying is the norm because we criticize differences instead of celebrating them. We create a world full of violence and hate because we are more worried about who are neighbor prays to than we are about how we act. We create a world full of difficulty because we take our thoughts and ideas so seriously we can't believe anyone would think something different.

We are all different people with different thoughts and experiences. This has led us to different beliefs and thoughts about what is important. These differences should be celebrated instead of feared. Instead of distrusting your neighbor because they are different, spend time getting to know and laughing with them. Instead of thinking everyone else is wrong, realize more than one person can be right. What is right for you may not be right for others. We are born, live our life and then die. Every one of us has this in common. We can't control everything that happens during the course of our life, but we can control how we look at each day and how we react to the things that do happen. Smile more. Laugh more. Stop taking things so seriously. Trust each other and help build a better, safer and more peaceful world.

It won't be easy and it may not make this world any better, but what we are doing now sure isn't working. Maybe it is time to try something else?

Change Your Thoughts

Simple enough, eh? This advice is anything but simple to institute in your life. It is something you have to constantly work at, but will make all the difference. Your thoughts control your world. The way you view yourself, other people, the things happening around you, really everything, controls the world in which you live.

Everything you will ever do starts with thoughts. If you want to live a positive, happy life, then you have to start with positive, happy thoughts. The more you dwell on the negatives, the more unhappy you will be. It looks simple from the outside, but you have to constantly remind yourself to not dwell on the negative things that happen (or at least what you currently view as the negative things). You will never change the world for the better until you change your thoughts for the better. 

Choose to be happy. Choose to believe in yourself. Choose to laugh more. Choose to see the best in the people around you. Choose to view the "negative" occurrences as nothing more than challenges. Choose to chase your dreams. Choose to cultivate a passion in what you do. Choose to push forward. Choose to learn something new every day. Choose to be open to change. Choose to embrace the world around you. Choose to find the positive in everything.Choose to make your world one in which you are excited each morning and exhausted each night. 

You have power to change your world. What choices will you make?

Collection of Random Short Thoughts

I know there are a lot of people out there who hate lists. If you are one, you can stop reading now as this post is going to turn in to a list. I have been doing a lot of thinking this last week, which I know is normal when anyone is dealing with loss. I wanted to be able to string together everything I have been thinking about into one blog post, but my mind keeps bouncing all over the place and anything I write does too. Instead, here is a list of some of the things I have been thinking about. Some of these may be blog topics in the future, but many express what they need to express in a sentence or two.

• Spend more time with those you love. These are the times that really matter in life.
• Spend more time doing things you love to do and less time doing the things you hate.
• Take time every day (or at least once a week) to just think. 
• If you hate your job, quit.
• If you like your job, then work your ass off to do the best work possible.
• The culture of a company is built by the people. If the culture isn't right, then the people aren't right.
• Embrace change, especially when it brings more work for you.
• Try new, little things each day. This will make it easier to embrace big changes.
• Don't automatically reject new ideas.
• Be honest and straightforward with people, even if it seems painful. Difficult conversation are usually important conversations.
• Stop worrying about everything.
• Don't hold back. If you have an idea (no matter how crazy), speak up. 
• Be more active. It's amazing how much better you can feel if you just get a little exercise each day.
• Stop talking about doing things as much and actually start doing them.
• Figure out what you need to change to become a person you can love and then make the changes.
• Believe in yourself and be confident, but not an egotistical asshole. It's a fine line and one you need to find.
• Feel free to be different, if that is who you are. 
• Have fun. If you aren't having fun, then figure out what needs to change so you can.
• Laugh as much as possible. Don't take things so seriously.
• Things will work out in the end. It may not be the way you want them to work out, but you can only do so much.
• Encourage the people around you by believing in them.
• Friendship and loyalty are expressed in deeds, not words.
• Don't be afraid to let go and move on. Don't dwell on the bullshit of the past.
• Nothing is impossible.
• Chase your dreams, no matter how crazy they are. You are in control of your life.
• Follow your heart...it already knows where you should go.

I Quit

Dear World-

This has been a long time coming, but today, I quit.

Today, I quit taking things so seriously. Many of the things that frustrate me don't matter. I realize this and I still let them frustrate me. Does it really matter if a car cuts me off or someone gets angry or an employee causes problems or something goes wrong or I make a mistake or the food doesn't turn out right or something doesn't work the way I think it should or someone makes a snide comment or any of the millions of other things I let frustrate me? No. So, starting today, I am not going to let you bother me. Life is meant to be spent laughing and being happy and not taking things so damn seriously all the time.

Today, I quit caring what other people think. If I am living my life in the way I see fit, does it really matter what other people think? I am not going to worry what people think about my writing or my tone or what I wear or how I look or what I eat or who I am. I am going to be true to me and live my life in the best way possible. If you don't like anything I am doing, feel free to tell me, but don't get upset when I ignore you. I'm not going to stop listening to the comments and critiques, but I am going to stop worrying about receiving them.

Today, I quit allowing self-doubt to creep in. This is much deeper and much worse than caring what other people think. I am no longer going to listen to the little voice inside my head who says I am not good enough to do something or I shouldn't try something because I could fail or who questions every decision as if it is life or death or who convinces me to procrastinate or who convinces me to fear change. I am going to stop listening to the voice and celebrate the things I am good at and work on the things I am not. If this means I come across as being arrogant sometimes, then so be it (see the paragraph on not caring what other people think).

Today, I quit fearing failure. Why do I fear failure so much? Even the word has a negative connotation, but the truth is, I am going to fail more than I am going to succeed, if I am pushing forward hard enough. Everyone fails at some point in time, but if I take it as a learning experience and not negative, then it becomes a knowledge builder. Building knowledge is a good thing and not something to be feared. I am not going to get it right every time, but if I learn from the mistakes and failures, then I can continue on doing better the next time. As the old saying goes, it doesn't matter how many times you get knocked down, but how many times you get up.

Today, I quit living based on how other people think I should live. I must embrace who I am and live the life I want. I have control over my life. If I decide to quit my job and pay the bills doing something different (like writing), then that's what I will do. If I decide to embrace Minimalism, yet still have a large television, then so be it. If I decide I no longer want the house and the yard and the car and everything I currently have, then I will get rid of them. The only person who can decide how I live my life is me (and Leila gets input since it is her life, too). I don't need to embrace the American Dream or any other dream I don't think applies to me. I can choose to live the life I want to live.

Today, I quit putting things off. There are a lot of items on my to-do list that keep getting pushed to the back burner and I am tired of it. I want to do a lot and I have to start now. No longer will I allow the excuses of not having enough time or not having enough money stop me from doing what I want to do. If I need more time, then I will find more time. If I need more money, then I will make more money. I don't want to lose the chance to do some amazing things in my life and create the memories I will look back at when I am on my death bed. Today, I will start working on the items I need to accomplish to make my life the life I want.

Today, I quit. Won't you join me?

Serious

Can we stop being so serious all the time? I am as guilty as anyone else and the older I get the less and less I seem to laugh. I know this needs to change.

As a society, we need to have more fun in all aspects of our life. We need to have fun at work. Outside of work, we really need to have more fun. We need to take more time off and go on more vacations and just do things that make us laugh and feel good about ourselves. Why do so many people become more and more serious as they age?

As we grow older, we see more and more responsibility, both at work and at home. Before we know it, we are paying bills and making large purchases and managing employees and running companies and balancing checkbooks and having kids and doing all kinds of other things we never thought we would do. We start to have "obligations" to fulfill. Life becomes less about having fun and more about making sure there is a roof over your head and food on your table. The laughter dissipates. The joy seems to be sucked out of many things we do and we feel challenged a lot more.

This doesn't have to happen. We shouldn't take ourselves or our lives so seriously. We need to laugh more. We need to play around more. We need to have more fun each and every day. The vast majority of "challenges" we face are not worth the stress. Yes, face them with everything you have, but don't let bring you down. This life is the only one you have. I know I don't want to be on my deathbed (hopefully many, many years from now) and regret the fact I didn't laugh more. I don't want to look back and regret the fact I didn't spend more time with people I love.

Today, I want you to spend more time having fun. I want to hear more laughter in the world. I want to see more people doing things they want to do and hear less complaining about how horrible things are. This doesn't mean you don't get your work done; it means finding ways to make your work more interesting and fun to do. If you can't do that, you need to find a new job. Get out there and do something interesting and enjoyable. Laugh more today. Smile more today. Worry less and have a lot more fun!

A Relaxing Evening

Spent a wonderful evening last night at The Living Room in Kansas City listening to the musical stylings of Victor & Penny and Danielle Ate The Sandwich. The venue was great, the music amazing and fun was had by all. If you haven't heard of either, check them out below. All in all, it was a wonderful evening with a wonderful woman.







While we rush through this thing called life and are constantly stressed out by everything happening, sometimes the most important thing we can do is slow down, relax, laugh and just have fun. This was the perfect release for what has been a crazy week.